If you’ve been reading, you know it’s been a long two weeks. A long, whiny two weeks. Now that there’s finally some light at the end of the tunnel – and Chris is winging his way back home – I have some clarity (though still not enough sleep) to piece together some thoughts about what I’ve learned:
I have great friends. In the middle of all of the craziness, I have friends that did wonderful things… like having already paid for pizza delivered to my door. And coming over to watch kids’ movies with me and the kiddos. And calling to check up on me. You know who you are and you rock. Really, truly rock.
I have not so great friends. At the same time, it became abundantly clear that I had other friends that have moved on. Nothing like a crisis or two to put things into perspective. I’m oddly not sad about this. Relationships can be tricky things to maneuver. And sometimes you need a sign. Or two.
I like coffee. A lot. Like you didn’t already know this one. If you follow me on twitter, you know that I can’t make a decent cup of coffee, especially using the French press. We don’t have a traditional coffee maker here at the house which means that I rely on Chris for my java in the morning (and sometimes my 4 yo, who, with Chris’ help can actually make a good cup of coffee – this, friends, is why you have children). Without him, I was planning on instant. Granted, it’s Starbucks Via, which is pretty good as instant goes, but still instant. So taking all of this into consideration, I thought I might take these two weeks to wean myself off of coffee altogether until I realized that was stupid. You see, I enjoy coffee. I don’t want to stop drinking it. And if that’s an addiction, I don’t want to be cured.
Summer doesn’t have to mean outdoors. I have this bizarre notion that I need to do things outdoors in summer. Try as I might to get the kids out and about, when it’s really hot, they don’t want to be out and about. Taking the dog for a walk in nearly 100 degree temps wore out even my most energetic kiddos. There was lots and lots of drama. I realized this yesterday, looking into Katie’s little red face. Forcing it is just silly. There is nothing wrong with piling into the car and embracing the good that is air conditioning. Yesterday, we went to a bookstore and a museum, with ice cream after. Everyone was happy (even me). Why would I discourage this?
Kids’ movies aren’t so bad. In fact, I actually enjoy a couple. I even have a girl crush on Anne Hathaway because of Ella Enchanted. I thought the Princess and the Frog was delightful. And I can watch the Princess Protection Program without twitching. Throw in some popcorn, dim the lights, add some snuggling with the kids and it’s downright bearable.
Every moment doesn’t have to be a learning moment. When I’m browsing on the web, I’m usually reading about tax. My bookshelves are filled with nonfiction books. I’ve been feeling like I need to be learning in my spare time. And I have limited spare time in my life. When Chris is gone, that time is even more limited. Ironically, that’s when it dawned on me: learning is overrated. Sometimes you just need froo-froo and silliness. I’ve missed that. I’m vowing to get it back.
I like a clean house. I thought that the house would fall to pieces when I was managing it, the office and the kids all by myself. Surprisingly, it didn’t (the mountain of laundry by the sofa, excepted). I feel better when the living room is clean. I just do. So I vacuumed every night whether I wanted to or not. I washed the windows. I cleaned the kitchen floor. And every time I walked into a clean room, I just felt better. I know what this means: I may be turning into my mother.
I will survive. As long as I know how to love, I know I will stay alive. I’ve got all my life to live, I’ve got all my love to give and I’ll survive. I will survive. Okay, so I stole that last bit from Gloria Gaynor. But you get the picture.
